but WAIT! you also get

How many times has this happened to you?

"Every time I try to hang up my jacket, the hangers fall on the floor, leaving me flustered and appalled!"

then YOU need to go to, not ONE, not TWO, but THREE CONSECUTIVE SHOWS this week! Act fast, and you can attend:

       this Sunday

   May 6th

  at Media Mansion (145 South Street, Northampton)

Yek Koo

La Lakers

Chris Cooper/Bill Nace duo

Horsebladder

     show starts at 8 and has to end by 11....so will start on time

"But these unsightly underarm stains make me feel so dissolute!"

Our scientists have been working night and day to bring you our patented QX-3000 remedy, guaranteed to eradicate inordinately lascivious discolorations, and quell the mating instinct in 97.4% of test subjects. Watch this live demonstration:

        this Monday
     May 7th
  at Feeding Tube Records (90 King Street, Northampton)
Jack Wright (sax) / Evan Lipscomb (double bass) / Johan Nystrom (drums) with Chris Cooper (guitar)
Diagram: A / Jeremy Starpoli
Andy Crespo / Ted Lee / Tony Pasquarosa (?)
   doors at 9, show at 10

"But I've been to OTHER shows, and sometimes, two just isn't enough!"

If you hurry, you can also attend, absolutely free ($8),

        this Tuesday
     May 8th
  at Flywheel (43 Main St, Easthampton)
John Wiese
Diagram: A / Gastric Lavage
Luminous in Nummer
   8:00 - 11:30

Don't miss out on this rare opportunity!